Clicking open the email, I smiled at the subject line: “LGA instructions with my artistic map attached.” For the past few years, I had been planning a solo trip to visit our daughter who lives in New York City. She and I finally had the margin to make it happen. Wanting my trip to be as easy as possible, she sent me an email with the best routes from the airport to her apartment. I had traveled to New York City numerous times, but this was my first time flying into the city instead of driving.
Complete with annotated maps, transportation options, as well as arrival and departure schedules, each step had been clearly outlined and described. She not only knew the city, but she also knew me—and she had spoken my love language. Details. It was an interesting moment of role reversal, and I valued it deeply. Clearly written beneath the layers of instructions was her desire to care for me well. The email was so much more than information, and my choice to take her work to heart far more than blind submission. I trusted her because she knew more about the city than I did. More importantly, I trusted her because she loved me.
Rarely, however, does life meet me with step-by-step instructions and detailed options for the next set of decisions looming in front of me. Some days, depending on how muddy the options seem to be, I’d settle for a post-it note. It’s in those moments that I’m tempted to look for some kind of formula to follow, even from God. Honestly, I want the details because I want to orchestrate the outcome.
In the past, when I would hear people talk about following the Holy Spirit’s lead, I would slip into a headspace focused on finding a formula. Centered on results rather than relationship, listening to the Spirit was more about me and less about Him. Was I hearing correctly? What if I got it wrong? How would I know which way to turn?
Then, God began to deal with my trust issues. I wasn’t afraid to admit I struggled to follow the Holy Spirit’s lead. But my reason? Certainly, it wasn’t a lack of trust in God–it was about not trusting myself. But I was lying to myself, most of all. Following the lead of the Holy Spirit was about outcomes. More specifically, about performance. And I was incredibly fearful I would fail.
The truth was that I didn’t trust God. I didn’t trust Him to speak clearly. I didn’t trust Him to look out for me. I didn’t trust His grace, and I certainly didn’t trust His mercy.
Over time, I’ve come to learn that God isn’t looking for me to draw close so He can give me information, nor is He looking for me to perform. He calls me to come near because He loves me and wants to give Himself to me. In that beautiful stripping away of what isn’t true, I’ve learned the leading of the Holy Spirit is significantly personal. From the numbering of the hairs on my head, to the details of my days, no one knows me like God does (Luke 12:7, Psalms 139).
Scripture teaches us, individually and corporately, why we should desire and follow the leading of the Spirit (see Galatians 5:16–18). He brings us into what is holy, good, and true (see Galatians 5:22–25). Scripture equips us to discern between the wishes of our own hearts and the Holy Spirit’s leading. But if we make the process of following His lead about finding good results rather than a relationship with Him, we have missed the point (see Romans 8:14–15). Results and a relationship are not in opposition to one another, but their order of priority determines the difference between life and death (Romans 8:2–4).
This truth I know—God loves me, and He wants me to know Him. To live in fear of missing the leading of the Holy Spirit is to misunderstand God’s goodness (see John 14:26).
The day I flew into New York City, I exited the airport and quickly made my way to the MTA stop. Boarding the bus, I plopped my suitcase onto the luggage rack and settled into a seat. I had been looking forward to this trip for some time. I watched the street signs, mentally marking off each stop in my mind. A fascinating ride, the roads were unknown (and in some moments, a little long), but West 106th and Broadway eventually came.
And when it did, Charis was there waiting for me.
–Written by Regina Franklin. Used by permission from the author.
12 Responses
Thank you Regina for these words!
eryn eddy adkins
Your experience and insights really hit home for me, Regina, especially this, “Honestly, I want the details because I want to orchestrate the outcome.” I too am focused on wanting to hear the Spirit correctly and not get it wrong. Thank you for your words. They’re helping me to make sense of my own lack of trust in our loving Father. I want relationship! And I’m so glad you had a wonderful visit with your daughter who loves you so much!
Amazing description of the life we choose to live and the faith that we need on our journey!
Awesome! I am glad that your daughter was waiting for you to be arrive! And THANK GOD FOR WHO HE IS
Great job Mom and daughter reunion.
Well written with bible references too.
Trusting God to be the center of all our life’s journey brings beautiful outcomes !
Thank you for sharing! I can really relate to this. "Be still & know that I am God". Amen.
Awesome
Thank you for sharing. God is so good.
Oh the beautiful truth! ♥️ God, help us grasp it and find a closer relationship with you.
God is Good, He loves me, I am saved!
God is Good, He loves me, I am healed!
It’s through the leading of the Holy Spirit I am learning to Trust God with Both these truths and grow in faith seed by seed in the planting of His word. Relationship with Him is everything I base these truths on. Praise the Lord he is always there with compassion, direction and in the arrival at our destination. Thank you Gina for putting words to page and helping us see the blessing of relationship with our Father in Heaven!
There are many times when I have been led by the flesh instead of letting the Holy Spirit lead me. I am so grateful that I am wiser now and know better. Having an authentic relationship with Jesus Christ, has enabled me to put flesh aside, and follow His lead. Thank you, Holy Spirit.