He Loves Me . . . He Loves Me Not

Sitting on the porch, feeling the sweet breeze in my curls, all I could think about was Mario. I picked petals to match my alternating thoughts.

 “He loves me.”

“He loves me not.”

“He loves me.”

 I wanted him to love me. But at six my ideas of love were undoubtedly immature. Growing up it’s easy to think about love in simplistic terms. We can equate someone’s affection towards us as a symbol of a deep-seated emotional connection. But sometimes love doesn’t look like what we have come to expect. It’s not always a warm and fuzzy feeling. It takes work. In fact, there’s not one relationship in my life that I can think of that hasn’t required effort. Perhaps unsurprisingly, my most important relationship took more sacrifice than any other. Not on my part.

 There is a man who gave everything he had to gain my heart. It’s nice to be chased. But he went further than anyone ever had to love me. There was nothing he wasn’t willing to do to make sure that I felt love. I can’t deny the impression he made when he traveled extreme distances to be close to me. It’s hard to push away someone who is infatuated with you. At times I did, because I thought I wanted something different. But he persisted. He encountered unimaginable humiliation and torture to be close to me. And ultimately, he sacrificed his life.

That man is Jesus. And His passionate pursuit wasn’t just for me, but all of us. His story is a picture of what love ultimately is—not a feeling or temporary infatuation—a surrender to serve others. Jesus’s desire and efforts to restore my relationship with God gave me a blueprint for loving other people well.

The Bible says, “Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.” (John 15:13 NIV). Self-sacrifice is the ultimate expression of love. That’s what our Savior did on the cross.

How does that impact the way we love others? You and I may not experience opportunities to literally die for others each day. But we can live this verse out. Recently, I began asking myself what I can sacrifice in my relationships to bring people closer to God and strengthen our bond. How do I model the love of Jesus?  I would literally rehearse these questions in my head daily. At first, it felt like I was speaking Christian jargon . . . and I don’t talk that way. But soon, these ideas, these actions began to penetrate my heart.

I started with my husband. And it was challenging, especially during a time of frustration or arguments that I wanted to win. But instead of going for the jugular in my responses, I would pause. The Holy Spirit would bring the theme of sacrifice back to my mind. Hesitantly I yielded to the gentle reminder. That was incredibly hard. It left me feeling like the burden of reconciliation was on my shoulders. Maybe you’ve felt that way too.  Over time, I began to see our relationship flourish more than I thought possible. The more I sacrificed, the more room there was for God to show up in our lives.

Now, I try to do this in every relationship with my kids, mother, sisters, friends, and co-workers too. Sometimes it’s small sacrifices like letting my children decide the dinner menu—macaroni and nuggets it is. Then there are moments when I’ve had my three kids all day and all I want is to retreat for peace and solitude. Instead, I have my sister’s kids over so she can rest. It’s amazing to witness how love in action can transform our relationships with others and deepen our appreciation for Jesus’s work on the cross.

How blessed are we to have the privilege to experience and share genuine love with others. It doesn’t always have to be grand gestures. Christ made himself available to others as He fulfilled His mission. How can we prepare our hearts to do the same? The pace of life can cause us to focus on our immediate needs. When we slow down, there is an opportunity to see ways to serve the people around us.

Maybe you take the money you would spend on lunch for the week and use it to feed the homeless population in your community.  Volunteering to clean up for an elderly family member is a great way to show you care. Your actions could be the answer to prayers and affirmation of being heard by God.

How do you think you can model Jesus’ love to others? As you think through opportunities to sacrifice, remember doing so is a way that we can help others see our Savior and know…He loves them.

—Written by Bree Rostic. Used by permission of the author. Click here to connect with Bree.