Not My Whim But His Will

The afternoon sunshine streamed through the family room window while my daughters—then just two and four years old—were playing independently, sitting amidst the many small toys strewn on the carpet all around them. They were each enraptured in their own play, virtually silent; I lounged alongside them, reading quietly.

I looked up from my magazine when my younger daughter’s voice broke through the quiet. In her toddler-speak, she asked her sister if she could play with the bauble in her sister’s hands. 

Big sis wasn’t ready to part with that toy just yet. So, she looked around, picked up another toy, and cheerfully passed it to little sis. 

To my surprise, little sis was content with the toy she was offered. I was proud to see that they’d negotiated a trade amicably and peaceably. Playtime resumed.

As I went back to thumbing the pages of my magazine, a thought crept into my mind, eroding the sense of satisfaction I’d had just moments before.

Underneath the kind demeanor of their childlike transaction lay a hard truth—one I needed to learn. I realized this vignette revealed my own heart toward the biblical invitation to give: do I give to the Lord something other than what He asks? 

The Bible is replete with positive guidance on how to please Him with our giving:

• To give generously (Deuteronomy 15:10, Proverbs 22:9) and to everyone who asks (Luke 6:30)
• To give to the poor (Matthew 6:3–4) and to meet the needs of those around us (James 2:15–16, Acts 4:32)
• To give cheerfully (2 Corinthians 9:6–8) 

And it also offers caution against withholding our gifts:

All day long [the sluggard] craves and craves,
    but the righteous gives and does not hold back (Proverbs 21:26 ESV).

Do not withhold good from those to whom it is due,
    when it is in your power to act (Proverbs 3:27).

I realized I was prone to the same behavior I’d just witnessed in my daughter:

When the Lord prompts me to volunteer at church or help a friend move, do I instead offer money because I’m uncomfortable with the task or unwilling to forgo the time? 

When the Lord puts a person without food or shelter in my path, do I rationalize not sharing my financial resources by internally citing my volunteerism at a job skills clinic?

When the Lord directs someone in need to me for help learning how to write more effectively, do I instead offer to write (or edit) their work myself because I’m accustomed to being compensated for that expertise?

God is gracious and doesn’t ask us to give something that He hasn’t already supplied us with. There have certainly been seasons in my life when scarcity in one area meant giving more generously from another. We’re right to think carefully and prayerfully about our true capacity, recognizing that God is also not only the Giver of all our resources, but also the One who appoints to us our limitations. Because He knows our hearts, we can trust that He knows when we’re ignoring His prompting and choosing instead to heed our own whims and preferences—even when veiled by other good gifts and service. 

Many of us sit amidst an array of resources every day, each a gift from Him. I know myself to be guilty of holding tightly to those resources out of preference or convenience instead of graciously sharing with others from the bounty He’s supplied. Yet because God did not “spare his own Son, but gave him up for us all” (Romans 8:32), I want to loosen my grip and be prepared to give whatever He asks of me.

—Written by Kristen Holmberg. Used by permission from the author.