Dreams and Fears

God Hears Her Podcast

Episode 66 – Dreams and Fears
Elisa Morgan and Eryn Eddy with Jade Gustafson

Jade:  As a sophomore in high school, it was I need to have a plan, I need to do these steps in this order to get to that end goal, and now, it’s God, where do you want me? Where am I going to be? What are the steps? What are the goals, you know? And it’s not my plan anymore, and even though that’s scary sometimes, it’s also extremely important because I am free floating, you know. Like, I’m just depending on God, and we can still make those plans. I’m not saying that you can just go and accomplish whatever you want without any goals or steps in the way, but I also know that if things don’t work out the way that I want them to be, it’s not a reason to be anxious or upset because God has a better plan.

[music]

[Intro: Your listening to God Hears Her. A podcast for women where we explore the stunning truth that God hears you, He sees you, and He loves you because you are His. Find out how these realities free you today on God Hears Her.

Elisa:  Welcome to God Hears Her. I’m Elisa Morgan.

Eryn:  And I’m Eryn Eddy.

Elisa:  When you reflect back on your life, do you see some instances where your dreams didn’t come true? Or maybe evolved into something you didn’t think they’d be. Or maybe you look back now, and you realize you’re in a place that you never dreamed of. Today we’re talking to a young college woman who’s going through the process of figuring out her dreams and watching them change from what they use to be. Jade Gustafson is currently a senior at Grand Valley State University studying English and Writing. She’s a blog post writer and a small group leader for GVSU’s Delight Ministries. While she’s figuring out her future, she continues to work at Our Daily Bread Ministries in the podcast department with us, and she is the best! We are so excited to talk with our very own Jade about her dreams and fears for the future on this episode of God Hears Her.

Eryn:  Elisa, I’m excited about this conversation for a few reasons. I always am excited about the conversations that we have.

Elisa:  Yup, that’s you. Eryn equals excitement, right, yup. [laughs]

Eryn:  Excitement! Woo! One of the things that I’m excited about is pulling back the curtain a little bit because when you and I first started recording, we had maybe two people in the studio, sometimes three, and then we had four, and then we had five. And over the course of the last few episodes, we have continued… our team has grown.

Elisa:  Yes, yes, it has. Even though we’ve been through changes when we went through the COVID restrictions we found ways, but it’s funny that even though we’ve needed to be remote and isolated in many circumstances, our team has grown, yes.

Eryn:  It has grown, but this angel up here, I mean, I think she’s an angel.

[Jade laughs]

Elisa:  She is [laughs]. She is. Yeah, you’re talking about a young woman who came into our team as an intern, right. A… a college student who interned at Our Daily Bread Ministries, yeah.

Eryn:  Yes. And what I love about just being an observer of her as she’s come into spaces, and picked up different pieces, and worn different hats, she carries this like old soul…

Elisa: Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Eryn:  … met with this like youthful spirit and…

Elisa:  And this incredible complexion, yeah.

[laughter]

Eryn:  Oh, yeah, that too. Like what is her skin care?

Elisa:  I know, I know, I know. I remember the first time we… we… we tried to pray before each conversation cause we don’t know what needs to be said, and several times this young woman has been invited to pray over our conversations and each time she does I’m like shazam. You know, s… she re… she really knows God, and she prays like your sayin, Eryn, more like an older soul. Well, I wo… I don’t wanna call her old, you… but more like an older soul who is… is praying from a well of a real legit relationship with God.

Eryn:  Yes, Jade, welcome to the God Hears Her podcast. You have been watching us stare at you talk about you…

Jade:  Yeah [laughs].

Eryn: [laughs]

Elisa:  Well done. See how mature she is. She didn’t even jump in and interrupt us or anything, yeah, yeah.

Eryn: [laughs]

Jade:  Well, I just wanna thank you guys. That was such a great welcome, I’m like wow, tearing up over here. You guys are so kind.

Eryn:  aww

Elisa:  Oh, well that’s nice…

Jade:  Thank you.

Elisa:  …I like that.

Eryn:  Aw, Jade, we’ll we’re so excited to have you here, so I want to give just a overview of what you do here at Our Daily Bread, God Hears Her.

Jade:  Yeah, yeah.

Eryn:  And then I wanna go into underneath and like learn more about you and right now, the present, the past, the future, all of the things, but lets first… what is it that you do here?

Jade:  I am an intern as you’ve both mentioned. I write the raps for our podcasts which is when we’re like “Oh, hi! This is God Hears Her. I’m Eryn, I’m Elisa,” I write those, and I also…

Elisa:  And you mean those aren’t in our own words, wait…

[laughter]

Jade:  Nooo, wow, wow. I just exposed both of you!

Elisa:  That’s awesome.

Eryn:  You know, I’ll say, Jade, when I first learned about raps for anybody listening, they’re like what is a rap?…

Elisa: [making music with her mouth]

Eryn:  … it’s kinda like the… I meant I was actually going to rap…

Elisa: [laughs] Don’t even try.

Eryn: … So, I’m so grateful…that that was not the case but continue.

Jade:  Yeah, well quick side note, when I learned that I was going to be writing them, I was so confused because I thought the same thing, and I was like A rap, why would you put a rap in a podcast? And it took me awhile to figure out no, no, no, no not raping.

Elisa:  Ah, thank goodness. No one wants to hear me try to rap, really.

Eryn:  It’s rapping the message that we communicate in bits.

Jade:  Yes.

Elisa:  It’s the intros, and the closings, and the in betweens, yah.

Jade:  And those fun little ads that we have, yup. So, I do that, and I also have started editing the audio which is very fun; I like doing that and adding the music to episodes. And I think my favorite part of this is finding potential people to be on the shows and doing research about them, which I really like because I just like knowing what the trends are and what’s going on in the world and what people need to hear. So, I love to research that and find that.

Eryn:  That is so cool, so how did you get… I mean, how did you get the intern… did… and, I mean, how did you find out about it? And then, what… what was it that you were like yes that’s what I want to do.

Jade:  So, it’s actually a very crazy story, and Mary Jo, who is my supervisor and also our producer for God Hears Her, we talk about this all the time…

Eryn:  Shout out to Mary Jo!

Jade:  Yes.

Elisa:  Yeah Mary Jo!

Jade:  Wooo! She’s the best…

Elisa:  Bow, bow, bow!

Jade:  But I actually… so I am graduating with an English major and a Writing minor, and I’ve always wanted to go into book publishing. And, yes, and I had a friend in the fall who told me about Our Daily Bread Ministries. I’d never heard of it before, but I go to Grand Valley State University so I’m in the area. So, I emailed them about the summer internship program for the publishing department, and I never heard back. And then, it was probably, I believe April or May possibly earlier than that, and I interviewed for the publishing internship, and I made it to the second round of interview, and then nothing. And so then, I get a call, I think about a week or two weeks later, something like that, for another position, and it was with social media and writing. So, I thought, well okay that will still be a really cool internship, and I have social media experience. So I interview for that one, get invited for a second interview, don’t get it. So, I’m…

Elisa:  Oh no! No!

Jade: …yeah, and I, meanwhile, applying to all these other internships and I just… I have no idea what this summer is going to look like. I wanted an internship, wasn’t finding anything. And so, I get a call on a random Saturday morning, and it’s HR at Our Daily Bread, and they’re like “Hey, we have another position for an internship, but it’s with podcasting.” And I’m like podcasting… I didn’t… previously did not listen to podcasts, was not ever… did not know anything about them.

Elisa: [laughs] I love it.

Jade:  And so, I… I mean, I wanted to work at Our Daily Bread, I wanted an internship, and I prayed about it. And then, I found out that the interview would be with someone that I previously interviewed with. And I was like oh man they rejected me last time…

Elisa:  They already didn’t pick me, yeah… thank you.

[laugher]

Jade:  Yeah, I’m like… I just like, I don’t have a chance, there’s no way. I almost canceled the interview, not even kidding. I almost canceled.

Eryn: [laughs] I don’t blame you. I would’ve done… I would wrestle with the same thing.

Jade:  And I… I prayed about two hours before, I think, it was the morning before the interview and I was just praying about it, and I just felt called to still attend the interview. And it’s like, hey, if you don’t get it, you’re still showing up, and you’re still just talking and gaining experience with interviews, you know?

Elisa:  Good. Good attitude, yeah.

Jade:  And so, I interview, and here I am. [laughs] I got the internship, and I worked at Our Daily Bread all summer. And I really hope that I return, and who know, but we’ll see.

Elisa:  So, I loved hearing the background cause we’ve just gotten to know you, you know, by working together some, but, you know, as any bodies listening knows, you know, we haven’t really been together but one time in a long time in… in person. You know, due to the remote thing we’re all doing, so it’s awesome to hear the background here. You know, wh… tell us a little bit about your story, growing up. I mean, how did you think… how is this dream, this desire or working, perhaps, in book publishing, or… maybe it’s gonna be media in some way. How did that get formed and shape in you?

Jade:  So, I am from Ludington, Michigan, and it’s a small town on Lake Michigan. And I’m not a fan of small towns; I loved growing up there, appreciated it, but I’ve felt like a city girl at heart. And my… one of my big dreams is to live in New York City. I don’t know if it will happen, we’ll see, God willing. But…

Elisa:  True, yea.

Jade:  …so I knew that I wanted to be in a city, and my sophomore year of high school I went through this phase of just high anxiety, and, I mean, I was only a sophomore, so I was fifteen at the time, but I just could not shake this feeling of not knowing what I was doing with my future. And I was panicked, I was just so anxious all the time, and I had no idea what I wanted to go into. And I really am not a fan of math, and I’ve never really felt called to do anything other than work with books and writing. And so, I had an English teacher in high school, and I would just talk to him about how I felt so hopeless about what God was calling me to do. And I had no idea what my purpose was or what I was supposed to go into, and I mean I still don’t really, you know, I still have so much life ahead of me. So, I ended up going and visiting a bunch of colleges and learning about their English programs and things like that, and I went unto Grand Valley State University’s campus, and it was the very last college that I visited in Michigan. And none of them felt like home. I didn’t like any of them, and I was just like “Maybe I’m not gonna go to college,” you know.

Elisa:  Right, yeah.

Jade:  But then, I get unto GV’s campus, and I just felt so much peace, and I was like, I’m going to Grand Valley. I just knew it, right then and there, and so, I did more research about the English program. And one of the things that they had listed for what their English graduates do is go into book publishing. And I had never heard of… of that. I knew, obviously I read all the time, I know that books are published, but it’s not really a career that’s talked about often, you know. I’ve never…

Elisa:  Yeah, you’re right,

Jade:  Yeah, I’ve never heard anything about it, didn’t know anything about it, and so, I started researching publishing houses, the process of publishing, all of it. And I learned about internships, and the writing process, and obviously going through college has helped me gain so much more information. But I just realized when I picked a college… I realized I wanted to go into book publishing, and now that dream has changed. I mean, I’m working at Our Daily Bread with podcasting, and I’ve just learned that I love sharing people’s stories. I love creating content for other people in the world and spreading messages that need to be heard, and I don’t know what that will look like for the future but I’m excited and I’m very thankful.

Elisa: You know, can… can I just jump in here just for a second, and… i… i…only if you’re comfortable Jade, but I’m really drawn to your vulnerability that you felt so much anxiety as a fifteen-year- old about what to do. And, you know, I’ve got a grandson who’s a little bit older than that, but I… he’s… he’s kinda confident… but I know underneath the surface he’s having that same… I think that era, and it last for, gosh, for me, a good decade, you know. Who am I, what am I supposed to do with myself, where do I fit? You know, it can you… can you thread some of how you processed that anxiety, what you learned about following God after your dreams, maybe even anything practical that God may have showed you to deal with that anxiety because, like you said, you knew you went to college, now you’re an intern, and you still don’t have your… your final place, you know, and you’ll have twenty if you’re like everybody else….

Jade:  Yeah, yeah.

Elisa: …but, you know, I… I just would love to… to… to just trace that thread in your discovery because I think we all relate.

Jade:  Yeah, so I have always been a big dreamer. I have always talked about New York City and living there and being there, and it’s just I’ve always set a goal and accomplished those goals. I’ve always been that way just very goal-driven, and when I was a sophomore in high school it just… I really don’t know where it stemmed from, but it was just part of having a plan. And as I’ve grown up, this didn’t happen when I was fifteen, but I’ve just really learned that it’s not about you’re plan. And we can have so many standards and goals set but it does not matter when it comes to the purpose that God has for your life. And so, at fifteen, I knew I wanted to go to college, but I didn’t know what that looked like, I didn’t know how I would pay for it, where I would go. And so, the first step for me with going to college was just praying about if that was the path that God wanted me to go into and visiting all those colleges like I said I visited so many. And I just… I was really praying before each visit, and during each visit just “God is this the place for me, is this where I’m supposed to be?” And there was nothing, I mean, you know, you get that radio silence, and you know that He’s listening but it’s just like what is happening right now? And then, like I said I got onto Grand Valley’s campus, and I just felt like that is where I belonged, so after returning from that I was so excited to go to college. And like I said, I was only a sophomore, so I still had two years of high school left and I loved them. It was a great time, but I was also so excited for the future. And when I came to college, then the anxiety sets in of what do I do with the rest of my life, what do I go into? And, in high school I was always the one reading a book, I was always the writer, and it’s like that’s Jade, that’s who she is. And then, I go to college and that’s everyone, like everyone in my classes is reading and writing all the time. And so, with that I think the challenge came with wondering if my purpose was not unique anymore cause when I was in high school, I just felt like that purpose is unique. Obviously, this was destined by God, this is what I’m meant to go into, and then, I get into college and the anxiety comes in. There’s a million other people who want to go into the same thing, so what in the world am I supposed to do? So, actually, I wrote down this Bible verse, but it’s “Cast all your anxieties on Him because He cares for you, and it’s 1 Peter 5:7. And I… my freshman year of college that Bible verse was extremely important to me, and it still is in every phase of life. But through going to college, I’ve seriously learned how to not be anxious about planning for the future because as a sophomore in a high school it was, I need to have a plan, I need to do these steps in this order to get to that end goal, and now it’s God where do you want me? Where am I going to be? Where are the steps? What are the goals, you know? And it’s not my plan anymore, and even though that’s scary sometimes, it’s also extremely important because I am free floating, you know. Like I’m just depending on God, and we can still make those plans. I’m not saying that you can just go and accomplish anything you want without any goals or steps in the way. But I also know that if things don’t work out the way that I want them to it’s not a reason to be anxious or upset because God has a better plan.

[music]

Elisa:  When we come back, Jade will talk more about trusting God with all of your anxieties and finding your worth in Christ instead of in your accomplishments.

[music]

Elisa:  Christmas is coming, and we have a great way to help you celebrate it joyfully. The God Hears Her a joyful Christmas kit includes our 31-day devotional with special reading with both morning and evening so you can start and end your day focused on Jesus. There’s a joyful Christmas ornament to hang on your tree as well as a notebook and pin pad to write notes. You’ll also get access to coloring sheets, a frameable print, prayer prompts, and the God With Us booklet that you can download. So go to godhearsher.org/joyful Christmas to order your Christmas kit and get ready for a joy filled Christmas. Now let’s get back to our conversation with Jade on this episode of God Hears Her.

Eryn:  One thing that you touched on earlier and I loved it was that it sounds like you are finding your identity and your worth in this dream that you sorta  crea… like this narrative that you hoped that your life would look like, and then when it took a different turn, or it changed, or you entered into a space of uncertainty you recognized I am not to find my self-worth and my identity into these narratives, or these dreams, or these stories that we tell ourselves but into the truth of who God is and what he has… what He wants to do in me and through me. And I just think that’s so beautiful that you’ve been able to recognize that and… and see that for…. I mean, there are so many times that I find my identity and my worth in hoping that something will pan out how I think it should. And then…

Elisa:  Instead of following after Him, yeah. And you know what else I heard, and this was a powerful maybe a throwaway line, I don’t know, but I loved it and I still related to what you’ve said and that was all of a sudden I wasn’t unique. All of a sudden… my dream wasn’t special, and I relate to that Jade, you know. I … I have felt for the longest time like I needed to be special in order to have value. I need to stand out…

Jade:  Yes, yes.

Elisa:  … in order to be recognized or noticed, and that’s another way we go at this huff and puff, you know, and trying to get love kinda thing, and how awesome that you began to see that super early because that is so much pressure to lug that along with you everywhere you go.

Jade:  Yes.

Eryn:  Absolutely. Jade, what… what was your upbringing like. For you to have think like grit and this older soul as we say, I’m just so curious. Do you have any siblings, and also, how old are you… can you say how old you are cause we’ve never really addressed how old you actually are?

Elisa:  She’s not fifteen. We got that straight.

Jade:  So, I just turned 21 in July, so I’m 21. And, I actually come from a divorced family, so I have a ton of siblings, but I love every single one of them and I’m very blessed by each one of them. But I have a brother and sister that are biological. We have the same parents, and then I have a half-brother who’s only 10, and he is absolutely adorable, the greatest kid ever. And then I have two stepsisters, and I would say, growing up with a bunch of siblings was seriously a blessing, a very very strong blessing, and I’m the oldest out of all of them. So, I think part of my, I don’t know, I would say old soul that’s your words I’m not saying that for myself, but…

Eryn:  Older humble soul right now…

Jade:  Yeah. [laughs]

Eryn:  …cause that’s what we’re hearin, continue. [laughs]

Jade:  Tryna…tying to be humble [laughs]. But I… from being the oldest, I had to take care of them a lot, and not because my parents weren’t present, but just because as an older sibling you’re always wondering what your siblings are up to, you know. Like, I would always be like oh what’s my sister doing? Where is my brother at? And it was like I don’t fully know why I was like that, but it was also just a protection of always wondering where they were and then also setting an example for them. And I think that’s part of where my goal-driven personality comes from is trying to set an example for all of them, and, I don’t know, if they look up to me. I hope that they do, but it’s just part of being their older sister is tryna make a way and show them that things are possible, you know. So, I’ve always tried to set goals and accomplish them and say, “Hey guys I did it, you can too,” you know.

Elisa:  I’m… I’m giggling inside about I don’t know you that well, but I’m hearing so many personality traits being expressed. I mean, you’re a self-motivated, very contentious, introspective, intentional, strategic kind of human. And I… yeah I want to go slip off into a whole personality discussion with you, but, you know, I…

Eryn:  I know, what are you on the enneagram? What’s your [inaudible]? What’s your color temperament? …

Jade:  I’m a three!

Elisa:  That’s why I was…

Elisa:  That’s why, cause Elisa’s a three too…

Jade:  Yup.

Elisa:  Yeah, I can… I can just really relate to some of the ways you’re… you’re describing your… your dreams, and I think one of the things about personalities like yours, if I look at mine, is… is you always have a dream. You… you always are forward looking into the what’s next, and… and… and you’re transition from being what do I need to be to what does God want me to be seems to be the… the rails or the… the road that He’s laid down for you to move forward. What… what kinds of anxieties do you continue to have as you move into your next, and next, and next?

Jade:  I recently got an apartment with my best friend, and that has been amazing. I love it. But, being brutally honest as a college student, financial anxieties are huge that’s a huge stressor for me. And I’m graduating college in December, so it’s also just where am I going to be after I graduate because it’s always been you go to college, you’re still going to school, and somehow I’ve been able to cover myself financially, but now it just feels like I’m being thrown into the world. And I’m super anxious about just where I’m going to be, what kind of job I’m going to have. I want to go into a career that I’ve always wanted to go into after I graduate, and now, I don’t know what that looks like. And now there’s an uncertainty about what I wanna do, and I’m realizing that I’ve always said this dream to people. I’ve always said I wanna go into book publishing. That’s always been my thing, you know, and now that I spent this whole summer working on podcast, I’m like there are so many things that I have no idea are out there. So many jobs that I could work that I would love that I don’t even know exist right now, and a part of my anxiety is disappointing those people, which I am working on that so much right now, but it’s just your life is your life. And the things that you do are the things that God wants you to do, most of the time, and so, whatever job I land in is going to be something that God has set for me, you know. And if that’s not book publishing, then that’s not book publishing, and I didn’t know that at the age of fifteen and that’s okay. And I … I can still go into that, but if I don’t, I shouldn’t worry about disappointing those people.

Elisa:  That’s so good. Jade, you know, I’m not sure if I ‘ve ever shared this story but when I graduated from college, this guy that I had been dating for six years and I broke up, and I needed to figure out what am I going to do with the rest of my life? I mean, like what you’re saying. And I had done an internship working in a hospital as a…. shadowing a hospital chaplain. And I though oh… I felt most alive there, which is one way you kind of figure out what you’re called to, and so, I ended up enrolling in seminary to become a hospital chaplain, which I’ve never been. However, you know, I … I became a… a teacher and a college, I became a writer, I became a CEO of nonprofit, a became a radio bro… blah, blah, blah, you know, all these things. And now in this stage in my life, I have also stood by the bed of many dying people and been a comfort, so the… the quilt approach, you know, of following God and knowing that He can use each experience as we’re attached to Him has been so rich. And it sounds like that some of what you’re discovering and… and you’re open- handedness, you know, wherever we are in transition, you know, whether we’re 21 tryna to figure out where to get an apartment, or you’re newly divorced tryna figure out how to support yourself again in a different way, you know, or you’re moving into retirement or…. You know, these transitional moments are ones where your truth principals you’re sharing are so empowering, Jade.

Eryn:  Yep. Absolutely. Jade, you know, one thing that I… I heard you say when you were sharing, you know, when people ask, they’ve known that this has been a dream of mine and now it’s changing. That ability to have open hands and the confidence to say, it’s changed, is hard no matter if you’re 21, 31, 41, 51, 61, 71, 81, it is hard to go I thought this was what it was gonna be and it’s this. Or I don’t know if it’s this, or I don’t know what it is.

Jade:  Yup.

Elisa:  And that is the dance. That’s the duet I guess that we… we have with the Lord of going alright, like, you take the first step, and I will follow you in this dance.

Elisa:  And you’re really modeling what you said that you value for everybody around you and those coming behind you in terms of your siblings and stuff, you’re modeling…. I had a dream and it’s being rearranged a little bit, and I’m trusting the one who weaves the dreams in our hearts. I’m trusting Him to clarify, and… and that’s an amazing gift to everybody around you, Jade.

Eryn: I’m curious, Jade, wha… what has community meant for you in this process of learning about your dreams? How has community played a part in the development of your dream?

Jade:  I love that question, Eryn. So, I… when I was in high school, I was pretty much a beginner with my faith I would say. I would get super passionate for a while, and I’d be reading my Bible and praying every night, and then, it would just kind of fade away. You know, and it would get back into just the life cycle and… and then I’d stop going to church for a while, and just things like that. And then, when I came to college my freshman year, I really wanted to pursue my faith. I wanted to find a church, I wanted to find a community, and I’d never had a good community of fellow Christians around me. Like, most of my friends are Christian, but in high school it’s a lot different than it is as you get older, you know. So, I… I’m at Grand Valley and I find this church that is incredible. And I join this small group and this small group was what I needed it to be at the time, but it wasn’t filling me the way that I need it to, and the church that I was attending was filling me, but I wasn’t meeting people there and I wasn’t connecting with people there. And so, my sophomore year I, this is kind of a long story, but I was really working on worth, Eryn, and I was just really working on feeling worthy because I constantly deal with not feeling worthy of Christ. And I was really working through that and studying my Bible and just praying a lot, and I heard about this thing called Delight Ministries on Grand Valley’s campus. And my sophomore year of college I was still kind of shy and introverted. I have definitely become way more extroverted but at this point in time I was still pretty introverted, and so I’m asking all of my friends “Hey, you wanna come to this meeting with me… hey you wanna come?” And nobody could come with me, and so the first week, the very first meeting I didn’t go because I was scared, and I didn’t have any one to go with and I didn’t know anyone there. And then, the second week I felt a prompting to go. It was just you need to go; you need to be there. And so, I ride the bus to campus all by myself and I get there I don’t know anyone there, but luckily, I got there the week that they were putting people into groups, and they were passing out popsicle sticks to put you in a group, and my popsicle stick word was worthy. I kid you not, it was worthy.

Elisa:  Oh wow. 

Jade:  And I’m holding this popsicle stick, and I’m just tearing up because it meant so much at the time.

Elisa:  That’s awesome.

Jade:  Yes, and I join my small group and the women are amazing, incredible. And in December… so I’m there for a couple months and leadership applications open up. And I’ve really connected with these girls, and it’s a place where you can be vulnerable, and you can show up as your full self. And I learned how to do that, and I learned how just to open myself up and to stop hiding the things that I was scared about. And I would say that’s part of what made me an extrovert is just not hiding anymore. So then in December leadership applications open up and like I said I was still pretty introverted. And I thought there’s no way that I can lead any of these women. I don’t know enough, I’m not worthy enough. And one of my leaders said, Jade, I want you to apply for leadership. And I prayed about it, I applied, and I got it. I got a leadership position, and I’m still there right now. I’m still a leader at Delight Ministries and I will be this year, but I have grown so much with that community, and like I said, I can be my full self-there and still feel fully loved. And these women are extremely supportive of everything, every detail, and I do something small and it’s just so celebrated. And I love that, you know, cause we all want to feel celebrated, and being an enneagram three, part of my worth or feeling worthy is achieving things and finding success. And so, it’s nice to know that even doing something small is a reason to be celebrated, so, yes.

Elisa: That’s so beautiful.

Eryn: I love how you showed up, and there was the word worthy on a popsicle stick. I mean, that is just what… that’s what God does. He… I think that He just plants these little, I call em God wings, [inaudible] I gotcha, you know. And I think the more we pay attention to our surroundings, we see so many of them. The more we give Him credit for those little moments that we desperately needed…

Elisa:  It’s so personal.

Eryn:  Yeah, it’s so personal. It’s… it’s…. it’s…. and that just goes to show like that’s when He sees us, you know, that’s when we know He sees us in those little God wing moments, and He uses community to do that to. He uses people that push us to do things we wouldn’t normally do. like you applying for leadership role, like He uses people to see us, to show us that He sees us. I love that Jade.

Elisa:  You know, in just a little bit, Jade, you’re gonna… you’re gonna cross another line, you know, you’re gonna come to another fork. You’re gonna come… whichever metaphor you want here. And… and I… I’ve always been intrigued by the… the fancy word for graduation is commencement. You know, and it really means beginning, but we think of it as ending. Isn’t that odd? But the reality is we do have to leave somewhere in order to go where we need to go next. We do need to… to end something in order to begin something. We do need to say no to something in order to say yes to something. That as… as you pray commencement over your life, wha… what would you ask God for in this moment?

Jade:  Well, I would just ask God that I would remain faithful and trusting in Him. I’ve learned a lot this past year of just putting my full trust in Him and depending on Him for everything that’s coming up next, and so I just pray that I have that same mindset going forward always. And I also pray continuously that wouldn’t put my worth in what I achieve because I have a big picture idea for my life, and if that doesn’t happen that doesn’t mean that I am less than. And I just pray that I remember that, and I just remain patient for all the things that are happening in the future or that I hope to have happen.

[musical interlude]

Elisa:  We’re so excited to see where God leads Jade. It was so encouraging to hear a young woman talk about trusting God with her future and the plans that He has for her. We’re all convinced that this is a woman who’s going to make a big impact on our world. Before we close out today’s episode of God Hears Her, we wanna remind you that the show notes are available in the podcast description. The show notes not only continue the talking points for today’s episode, but also links to connect with Eryn and me on social. You can visit our website at godhearsher.org, that’s godhearsher.org.

Eryn:  Thank you for joining us and don’t forget God hears you, He sees you, and He loves you because you are His.

Eryn:  Today’s episode was engineered by Anne Stevens and produced by Mary Jo Clark, Daniel Ryan Day, and Jade Gustafson. Today we also wanna recognize Barry and Brian for their help in creating the God Hears Her podcast, thank you.

Eryn:  God Hears Her is a production of Our Daily Bread Ministries.